I face the blank shapes
of stranger's faces,
chilled to the bone,
shivering with adrenaline.
I open my mouth,
but my vocal chords are laced
like too tight shoes.
I swallow, and somehow,
the music comes out.
My tiny voice barely
reaches the first row,
a tiny mouse squeaking
on a football field.
My knees come perilously
close to giving way.
My palms drip uncontrolled.
Words spring
from my memory the split second
before they are sung,
pulled with all my might.
The small plastic smile on my face
starts to come unglued.
I fear what expression
is behind it. Suddenly,
a recognized face brings
back the meaning of the words.
A warmth fills my limbs,
and my confidence returns.
I'm making musical
rainbows I never learned
the recipe for.
The melody swells within my chest
and strains to come out.
I release it
and happiness fills my body.
I gasp out the last words
and breathe deep.
The applause falls
on my ears like warm raindrops,
soaking in
and soothing all of my fears.
A small genuine smile beams out.

Lindsey Milton 1996

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